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Charlie Sheen: “Les- than-Goonves, Screw Les, or better yet, Screw more.”

By Roger Friedman

HollywoodNews.com: “Les- than-Goonves, Screw Les, or better yet, Screw more.” is the way Charlie Sheen began his latest video diatribe on Ustream tonight. He then attacked all the executives involved in “Two and a Half Men.” But that’s what he said about the head of CBS. He’s lucky that all they did was fire him.

“Where are you hiding you silly clown? I see you you little worm,” he said to Chuck Lorre. If Sheen was trying to ingratiate himself to his bosses, this was not the way to do it. He might as well have inflated a slide on a parked airplane and jumped out. Oh, yeah: that’s been done. He was vicious and totally inappropriate to Lorre, baiting the recovering alcoholic to take a drink. It was mean, not clever, and low, like a grade school taunt. It was maybe the most unbecoming moment of Sheen’s spiral down into madness.

Otherwise, this was typical Sheen. He called his firing “unconscionable.” Tonight it did seem like Sheen was more prepared, reading from either cue cards or some kind of notes or Prompter. “F–k Borre” is what he called Lorre. The crazy thing is this wasn’t over an international crisis. It’s over a TV show. But Sheen doesn’t see the difference between any realities. He’s delusional. But in the end, the counter on his UStream page read that only 58,000 viewers tuned in at the height of Sheen’s shpiel. Is that it? Is Charlie done?

The funniest thing tonight was the idea that he’s been so wronged. Charlie, it’s just a TV show. It’s a sitcom. It’s funny, but it’s not “MASH” or “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” or “Seinfeld” or even “The Office.” So you were fired. It was not unconscionable. Move on already.

“You are no match for this warlock,” Sheen concluded.

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